Scandalicious!
Oct. 26th, 2008 05:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
zannesTitle: Scandalicious! Where America Goes for Gossip: Supernatural or Supernaughty? by Marian Kingsley
Author: ZanneS
Rating: PG (bad language)
Genre: 100% CRACK/RPF...RAF?
Characters: the two cats and tiny dog from "Yellow Fever", OFC, mention of Ackles, Padalecki, and Kripke
Summary: Rumors of juggling on-set catch the attention of the world's biggest gossip mag.
Author's Note: My beta wishes to remain anonymous so as to retain his/her dignity. This story is total crack. I wish I could blame drinking, but I've been sober all weekend.
Scandalicious!
Where America Goes for Gossip
Supernatural or Supernaughty?
By Marian Kingsley
My sources are already waiting at La Page, LA’s hottest new eatery for the up and coming in Hollywood (ever since we found Paris Hilton vomiting up her brioche in the ladies’ last week before going back for seconds). The two are sipping cocktails as they blend in with the who’s-gonna-be-who in the entertainment arena.
You might have seen TomKat and Pennywinkle in their breakthrough performances in “Yellow Fever”, the latest episode of Supernatural, the CW’s ratings juggernaut drawing fans from across the world.
As I take my seat, TomKat politely offers me a meowmosa, a specialty drink he invented mixing milk and champagne for those early power brunches. It seems a popular drink at this table, at least three glasses sitting by Pennywinkle’s plate.
I decide to stick with coffee.
M: So, TomKat….I have to ask….
TK: Yes, I’m currently in negotiations with Cruise’s people over rights to my name.
M: Let us know how that goes.
TomKat nods, passing over a business card to keep in touch.
M: But now onto our reason for meeting today. You said you had some secrets to share about your recent stint on Supernatural? There have been some allegations of…juggling on set?
TomKat lowers his eyes, the picture of abused innocence. It only takes a couple of elbows to the side for Pennywinkle to do the same as she tries to lap up the liquid in the bottom of her glass.
TK: We’d heard the rumors, of course. But we’ve always viewed Mr. Ackles as a consummate professional, and when the opportunity came up for roles on television’s hottest sci-fi show marketed to the 18-30 demographic at 9:00 Thursday night (7:00 Central) on the CW? We just had to take the chance!
PW: It was a very *hic* nice set…very professional. Krakatoa was the nicest guy….
TK: Kripke, Penny.
PW: Sat’s what I said…Krispy.
TomKat rolled his eyes and quickly redirected back to the main story.
TK: As Penny said, it was completely professional the first day on-set. We got our own trailer, they made sure to follow our special diet…
PW: No carbs!
TK: But then we were introduced to the stars of the show and I-…we both felt it. His eyes were already on us and he was staring at us like we were…
PW: …*hic* pieces of meat! Cute, furry meat that likes getting its chin scratched….
TK: Obviously, as a more experienced actor, I’ve been in some uncomfortable filming situations before, and I could handle myself when accosted by the brute. But poor, naïve Penny over here….
PW: *hic*
TK: …she wasn’t aware of the effect it might have on her future career.
PW: He promised me a role in My Bloody Valentine II!
TK: She wasn’t aware of the lies these big names make just to get in a little juggle in their trailer after a scene.
PW: His hands were so…big! And he almost dropped me…twice. *hic* I kinda liked it....
TK: Penny was emotionally scarred by the experience - post traumatic stress....
The kitten paws at her drink, her nose disappearing almost entirely into her champagne glass. TomKat gives her another elbow.
PW: I think he was drunk. *hic* BARTENDER!
M: What is your next step?
TK: Our lawyers are contacting Mr. Kripke and Mr. Ackles to see if we can reach a mutually beneficial arrangement.
PW: Klingon was very *hic* understanding. Said Ackles had a real problem stayin’ away from the puss*hic*y.
M: What about Terrence? He played the evil hound that chased Mr. Ackles throughout the episode. Was there anything….untoward between him and Mr. Ackles?
PW: Oh, no! Terrence spent all of his time in that Paddalacki’s trailer. *hic* Every time we saw Terrence he was draped over Palatacki’s lap….
M: Because Terrence says that your accusations are unfounded and….
TK: That lying bitch!
The champagne glass goes flying, barely missing our waiter.
TK: He’ll say anything for a belly rub! That furry. Little. Whore!
Unfortunately, we were unable to continue with the interview as my guests were escorted from the restaurant shortly thereafter. My guess is that legal proceedings will deteriorate and no further allegations will be made against Mr. Ackles.
However, we’ll be there to keep you up-to-date the next time we sniff out any juggling rumors because we’ve got the nose for news.
Author: ZanneS
Rating: PG (bad language)
Genre: 100% CRACK/RPF...RAF?
Characters: the two cats and tiny dog from "Yellow Fever", OFC, mention of Ackles, Padalecki, and Kripke
Summary: Rumors of juggling on-set catch the attention of the world's biggest gossip mag.
Author's Note: My beta wishes to remain anonymous so as to retain his/her dignity. This story is total crack. I wish I could blame drinking, but I've been sober all weekend.
My sources are already waiting at La Page, LA’s hottest new eatery for the up and coming in Hollywood (ever since we found Paris Hilton vomiting up her brioche in the ladies’ last week before going back for seconds). The two are sipping cocktails as they blend in with the who’s-gonna-be-who in the entertainment arena.
You might have seen TomKat and Pennywinkle in their breakthrough performances in “Yellow Fever”, the latest episode of Supernatural, the CW’s ratings juggernaut drawing fans from across the world.
As I take my seat, TomKat politely offers me a meowmosa, a specialty drink he invented mixing milk and champagne for those early power brunches. It seems a popular drink at this table, at least three glasses sitting by Pennywinkle’s plate.
I decide to stick with coffee.
M: So, TomKat….I have to ask….
TK: Yes, I’m currently in negotiations with Cruise’s people over rights to my name.
M: Let us know how that goes.
TomKat nods, passing over a business card to keep in touch.
M: But now onto our reason for meeting today. You said you had some secrets to share about your recent stint on Supernatural? There have been some allegations of…juggling on set?
TomKat lowers his eyes, the picture of abused innocence. It only takes a couple of elbows to the side for Pennywinkle to do the same as she tries to lap up the liquid in the bottom of her glass.
TK: We’d heard the rumors, of course. But we’ve always viewed Mr. Ackles as a consummate professional, and when the opportunity came up for roles on television’s hottest sci-fi show marketed to the 18-30 demographic at 9:00 Thursday night (7:00 Central) on the CW? We just had to take the chance!
PW: It was a very *hic* nice set…very professional. Krakatoa was the nicest guy….
TK: Kripke, Penny.
PW: Sat’s what I said…Krispy.
TomKat rolled his eyes and quickly redirected back to the main story.
TK: As Penny said, it was completely professional the first day on-set. We got our own trailer, they made sure to follow our special diet…
PW: No carbs!
TK: But then we were introduced to the stars of the show and I-…we both felt it. His eyes were already on us and he was staring at us like we were…
PW: …*hic* pieces of meat! Cute, furry meat that likes getting its chin scratched….
TK: Obviously, as a more experienced actor, I’ve been in some uncomfortable filming situations before, and I could handle myself when accosted by the brute. But poor, naïve Penny over here….
PW: *hic*
TK: …she wasn’t aware of the effect it might have on her future career.
PW: He promised me a role in My Bloody Valentine II!
TK: She wasn’t aware of the lies these big names make just to get in a little juggle in their trailer after a scene.
PW: His hands were so…big! And he almost dropped me…twice. *hic* I kinda liked it....
TK: Penny was emotionally scarred by the experience - post traumatic stress....
The kitten paws at her drink, her nose disappearing almost entirely into her champagne glass. TomKat gives her another elbow.
PW: I think he was drunk. *hic* BARTENDER!
M: What is your next step?
TK: Our lawyers are contacting Mr. Kripke and Mr. Ackles to see if we can reach a mutually beneficial arrangement.
PW: Klingon was very *hic* understanding. Said Ackles had a real problem stayin’ away from the puss*hic*y.
M: What about Terrence? He played the evil hound that chased Mr. Ackles throughout the episode. Was there anything….untoward between him and Mr. Ackles?
PW: Oh, no! Terrence spent all of his time in that Paddalacki’s trailer. *hic* Every time we saw Terrence he was draped over Palatacki’s lap….
M: Because Terrence says that your accusations are unfounded and….
TK: That lying bitch!
The champagne glass goes flying, barely missing our waiter.
TK: He’ll say anything for a belly rub! That furry. Little. Whore!
Unfortunately, we were unable to continue with the interview as my guests were escorted from the restaurant shortly thereafter. My guess is that legal proceedings will deteriorate and no further allegations will be made against Mr. Ackles.
However, we’ll be there to keep you up-to-date the next time we sniff out any juggling rumors because we’ve got the nose for news.
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no subject
Date: 2008-10-27 01:14 am (UTC)TK: Kripke, Penny.
PW: Sat’s what I said…Krispy.
Dying!!! I haven't been drinking either. :-)
no subject
Date: 2008-10-27 01:18 am (UTC)Kitten Juggling! FTW!!!!!!!
Date: 2008-10-27 02:11 am (UTC)Fan-frakkin'-tastic!
Re: Kitten Juggling! FTW!!!!!!!
Date: 2008-10-27 02:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-10-27 03:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-10-27 03:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-10-27 05:04 am (UTC)I loved it. *draws hearts*
no subject
Date: 2008-10-27 08:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-10-27 06:24 am (UTC)*opens mouth; closes mouth*
*FLAILS*
*headdesks*
*FLAILSFLAILSFLAILS*
no subject
Date: 2008-10-27 08:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-10-27 09:20 pm (UTC)Hee! It's actually kind of bloody awesome. Jensen
molestingjuggling poor defenseless pussies and Jared cheating on him with a dog. TALKING CATS FTW! Next part? LOLCats guest on Supernatural, story at 11. And also, "When learning impaired TV stars attack!"-- Disclaimer: Jensen Ackles being nable to read not implied.Also also? This might have been my favorite part. the latest episode of Supernatural, the CW’s ratings juggernaut drawing fans from across the world.
Ahaha! "ratings juggernaut", indeed!
Also also also, dogs are kind of sluts. Only, cleaner than Paris Hilton.
no subject
Date: 2008-10-28 08:55 pm (UTC)I've been having a hellacious month but as long as the wonderful writers keep coming up with stuff like this I'll survive.
Thanks for the giggle fit even if it did make my tummy hurt.
no subject
Date: 2008-10-29 12:25 am (UTC)